American Horror Story: Asylum- Dark Cousin

Subtle me.

So, Grace is feverish and bleeding from her pelvic area, which is always a great sign.  The nurses attending to her don't want to take her to Arden because they say he's the one who sterilized her.  Grace is all but dead, when the nun hits her chest and she comes back to life.  But she says they should have let her go.

Mary Eunice tells Arden the sterilization is hemorrhaging, but Arden denies performing the sterilization.  Mary Eunice mouths off to Arden and he slaps her.  She says if he touches her again, he'll die.  He goes to backhand her and she sends him flying across the room.

One of the patients is hearing voices in a room with a table saw.  I guess Briarcliff is part asylum, part jail, part sweat shop, among other things.  There was no way in the world that I was going to watch a man hearing voices stand near a saw, but I am told that he puts his arms near the blade.  Mary Eunice comes in and sees an Aramaic name written on the wall in blood.  Miraculously this dude is still alive and she asks him if he summoned "her."  He has no idea what or who Mary Eunice is talking about.  He gets stitched up and strapped down, but he is visited by the angel of death.  He pulls out his stitches and bleeds out.

Arden visits Grace and tells her she has an infection.  He insists he did not perform the hysterectomy, and even though he finds her to be useless, he won't let her die if he's going to get blamed for it.

Now, for some reason, Oliver rapes Lana.  Because things weren't bad enough.  Lana sees death.

Kit is with the police, and he tells him the confession was a trick.  He sees an opportunity to escape and makes a run for it.

Death came for Lana and is about to take her when Lana hesitates.  Oliver comes in the room and says they have reached an impass, obvi.   Although we've not hardly seen them this episode or anything, sure, they have reached an impass.  He says she can choose between having her throat cut or being strangled.  He's about to sedate her when she hits him over the head and starts choking him out with her chains.  She grabs the keys off his key ring and gets loose.  But Oliver isn't dead.  They tussle on the stairs til she knocks him out.

Girls, obviously, if you ever find yourself in this situation, I think it goes without saying, you have to choke until you're sure the psychopath is dead.  Choke him for 20 minutes if you have to.  But if you don't, you are dumb.  Sorry, not sorry.

So Lana escapes and runs to the street where she jumps into the first car she sees.  Inside is Tom Cruise's cousin who happens to super duper hate women because his wife just cheated on him.  I wonder how many times this season Lana has said "Why are you doing this to me?"  Probably like once an episode cuz the girl can't catch a break.  Death is in the backseat and Lana can't believe it's going to end like this, after everything she's been through and then...

When she comes to, she's back at Briarcliff.  Oy.

We're back to Jude and Goodman.  She sees an article about the girl she killed taped the the TV.  She flashes back to one time when she missed a gig and got kicked out of the band.  One of her bandmates tells her a detective wants to speak to her about the hit and run.  She packs up her stuff and drives off, but she hasn't learned her lesson cuz she is still drinking while driving, until she hits a tree by a church.

In present day, Jude gets a call in Goodman's room from Mary Eunice who tells Jude she is the devil.  She left Jude some liquor and a blade.  In a very lovely scene, they show Jude cutting her arm so she can bleed out, but it was just her imagination.  Jude is ready to die, but she just needs to do one thing first.  She goes to visit the parents of the girl who she hit with her car.  The father side-eyes her to no end.  But it turns out the girl wasn't dead after all. She's still alive and has a daughter.

Lana wants to see Jude, but Mary Eunice is in charge now.  Lana tells her that Oliver is Bloody Face and Kit is innocent, which Mary Eunice obviously knows.  But how will she use this information?

Kit meanwhile sneaks back into the asylum.  What is with people and sneaking into this place?  We catch a glimpse of  a creature.

Grace is much improved, and Kit comes in for her.  A nun catches him  but the creature attacks her.  Kit... disembowels the creature?  But then Frank comes in and shoots at Kit, but hits Grace...

This show has me exhausted.  As a viewer, I feel like Lana.  Things keep happening, but no matter what, I end up back in the asylum.  Next week: killer Santa.

What did you guys think of the episode?  Gory enough for you?

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