Real Housewives of New Jersey: Teresa Meets Leah in Chi town

You never know who you are going to meet!

Guess who made a trip to Chicago? None other than the popular Real Housewife of New Jersey, Teresa Giudice. Teresa has a new cookbook out for healthy eating and she was in Chicago for a book signing. Teresa got a lot more than she bargained for at the signing.

Leah DeSimone, star of Mob Wives Chicago, went out to Barnes & Noble last night, with some girlfriends, to DePaul University Bookstore in Chicago, in her hometown, to attend Teresa's event. I guess Leah isn't use to the publicity yet because, as she went back out to the car to feed the meter, employees came rushing  out to get her to come back in to meet with Teresa. Leah obliged, but expressed to them that she really didn't want to cut in line. Teresa Giudice, who is currently on RHONJ and recently appeared on The Celebrity Apprentice (and I may add that she did pretty well), has written another cookbook titled "Fabulicious! Fast & Fit." 

Leah went in and posed with Teresa and said she couldn't believe the media frenzy. Leah still has a hard time realizing that people are recognizing her. For one, I personally think that even if she wasn't cast on Mob Wives Chicago, her hair alone is a head-turner. Teresa and Leah chatted and took many pictures for the fans. 

Teresa and Leah at Dinner

After the book signing, Leah took Teresa downtown to Taylor Street for a tour and dinner. Taylor Street is the Little Italy of Chicago which is famous for its many great Italian restaurants. It sounds like our popular Mob Wife was having some fun.

Please follow me on twitter @carmelacorleone I will be blogging the Big Ang show that premieres July 8th at 9:00 PM ET/8C on VH1

Written By: Carmela Corleone

Picture Credit: Leah DeSimone

Celebrity Apprentice: Victoria and Teresa Round 2

The very beginning of the show starts with the end of last week’s show, with Victoria coming out of the board room narrowly escaping being fired. Lisa is scared that Victoria will kill her in her sleep for mentioning the fact that she made personal phone calls while she was supposed to be working. She apologizes. Victoria replies it’s going to be tough to work together if they are going to turn on each other, but she is ready---bring it on!

Now let the games begin. Literally! This week’s task is for each group to create a 15 minute show for Medieval Times and it will be judged by the audience on creativity and entertainment value. I have been to Medieval Times and it can be quite an experience. The outside looks like a castle. Inside, they serve dinner while they have knights jousting on horses, horse tricks and various other types of medieval entertainment. The teams need to pick their project managers and get started. The men’s team, Unanimous,  picks Penn Jillette. The women’s team, Forte, picks Lisa Lampanelli. The project manager of the winning team will walk away with $40,000 for their charity.

Keep in mind I am only concentrating on Victoria and Teresa, if you want a complete recap of the show this is not it, but there are plenty online.

Lisa comes up with the idea of doing something current in a medieval setting. She decides, since they are performing in New Jersey, to do a parody or spoof of the Real Housewives of New Jersey. The idea translates into The Unreal Housewives of Camelot fighting for the love and affection of Sir Donald of Trump, king or knight of Camelot, played by Lisa Lampanelli herself.

Dayana asks if there will be a lot of children the audience because she isn’t sure this idea will appeal to them. Lisa basically tells her to shut up and wear her nude leotard, ride in on a horse and look pretty…like Lady Godiva. That’s all she is good for. Neither Teresa nor Victoria have anything to say. To be honest, Lisa doesn’t want to hear from anyone but Aubrey, who becomes her second in command.

Lisa is excited about doing a clean and funny show. She assigns the roles to the women. She wants to use each individual’s specific talents appropriately. She decides to give Victoria the hardest job of creative director working with the lights and sounds. Victoria isn’t happy and says, “Why don’t you just put me in the closet?” She feels left out and that everyone has a role except her.

Victoria proves to be a whiner not a winner!

It’s time to pick out the costumes for the various roles. Everyone is excited and it gets a little noisy, Lisa loses her patience because people are interrupting her. She acts like a tyrant. Teresa’s role is the table flipping housewife (apparently there was a famous scene in RHONJ where she flipped a table). They (Lisa and Aubrey) feel this is a great idea because they are playing to the NJ crowd with a popular show they can relate to. Teresa has to work hard to learn her lines, she is used to reality television where you say whatever comes to mind. One of her lines is “Bring it on wench!” 

Lisa is writing the script and Don Jr. shows up. She asks if his father will mind if she plays him with a wig. He thinks it will be funny and she can’t get fired for that, the audience picks the winner. Don Jr. also likes their concept. Lisa mentions the tension with Victoria and tells him she doesn’t think being stage director is important. She sent her shopping to get her out of the way. 

All the women are practicing their sword fighting. They look to Victoria for instruction on how they should “act.” Victoria backs away from being stage director, she isn’t comfortable with the role. So, they tell her to take a sword and fight. Victoria is swinging her sword all the while she is wearing her Louis Vuitton bag! No one is happy about that. So then they move Victoria into doing some research with Lisa. They need to look up medieval words to use in the script. Lisa almost has a stroke! Instead of googling “medieval” which is right on the stationery in front of her, Victoria is typing in mid-evil into the search bar. Lisa is pissed because Victoria can’t even look at the paper in front of her. 

Victoria whines that she isn’t happy, she feels left out of the task, unacknowledged and invisible. Lisa tells her she has the most important role. Victoria seems to come around.

Dress Rehearsal! Victoria seems to take control in the sound room. Lisa starts to feel a little confident. However, Victoria doesn’t have the updated script so the lights and sounds are not happening when they are supposed to! Lisa is pissed again.

Show Time! The men perform first, under the leadership of Penn Jillette, and seem to do well. The next performance is by the women. Problems from the get go!

Teresa proves to be a winner!

Victoria is in charge of lighting and sound, however, when King Lisa/Donald comes out on stage there is supposed to be a trumpet flourishing his entrance…there was none, so Lisa had to use her voice to create the trumpet sound! The fighting begins for Sir Donald’s love. Teresa and another wench sword fight and Teresa wins the battle. She asks if she has done enough to win his heart. The Donald says, “You’re fired!” Teresa gets angry and flips over a table. When both shows are over the crowd votes for their favorite team.

Back at the boardroom, Donald begins his interrogation. He asks Victoria about Lisa. She says Lisa was a strict project manager, a good leader, but Donald senses some hesitation. Lisa explains that there was some tension between them from the start when she assigned the roles and Victoria felt that stage director was not important and that she was pushed aside. Teresa played a housewife and says she was challenged because it was so different from reality tv, but she was able to use her emotions from RHONJ to “act” in the show.

Donald wants to know from Lisa, who she would bring back to the board room. She chooses Victoria and Dayana. Victoria because she threatened to quit the team and go to the men’s team, she didn’t want her assigned role to be stage director and Lisa said she felt she was emotionally left out and she didn’t have time to “mother” her.

Lisa says she picked Dayana because she didn’t contribute anything except for being pretty on a horse (however, that is exactly what Lisa told Dayana that was all she wanted her to do). Dayana says that she was never allowed to voice her opinion, though she tried several times to make suggestions.

The VOTES are in and the men win it, 558 to the women’s 363. Now the men can go relax while the women trash each other in the boardroom. 

Lisa begins listings all of Victoria’s shortcomings: the missed cues, the inability to google, the threatening to quit. Victoria says she did a lot to work with the team. Apparently, all the work Victoria did with the costumes went unacknowledged or filmed, but Dayana agreed with her. Victoria thinks Lisa should be fired.

Both Victoria and Lisa breakdown crying in front of Donald, out of frustration. But, Donald has to make a decision. He decides that due to the missed cues and the fact that Victoria even thought about quitting the team, leaves him no choice but to tell her “You’re fired!”

An unhappy, fired Victoria

I am very disappointed and happy at the same time. I feel let down because this is not at all how I thought this was going to go. I was sure Victoria had the stuff to get ahead and succeed and she was going to leave Teresa in the dust. But, it turned out to be just the opposite. We have a TKO! Technical Knockout for Victoria and Teresa is still left standing without a mark on her. Not one complaint about Teresa in two weeks while Victoria had a laundry list full of issues. 

I am happy because now that Victoria is out, I will not be blogging this show any more. It was a lot of work because it is on the same night as Mob Wives, and my loyalty is to that show first and foremost. I thought this would be an interesting competition to blog, but I sure as hell didn’t see this ending coming, and not so soon. Maybe I underestimated the real housewives OR Victoria Gotti is not the badass mob wife I expected her to be. She whined and complained and didn’t rise to the occasion. Teresa, on the other hand, played her cards smart. She was quiet and unassuming and did what she was asked with a pleasant attitude. Even though I didn’t hear or see much of her, whatever she did kept her off the chopping block and everyone loves her and that is one sure fire way to get ahead.

Kudos to Teresa Giudice! TKO in Round 2 of Celebrity Apprentice! Congratulations and I wish you much success throughout the rest of the game!

Celebrity Apprentice: Victoria and Teresa Round 1

Let the games begin!

Well last night was the premiere of Celebrity Apprentice. I watched it just to follow Victoria Gotti and Teresa Giudice! Mob Wife versus Real Housewife, New York versus New Jersey. I am going to assess their contributions in the competition and at the end tell you who I think won round 1, although it might be obvious!

First a few details. There are 18 people competing this season, now 17. It’s set up as the men versus the women. Each group has to pick a project manager and a team name and then meet Donald in the board room for their task. On the women’s team, Teresa suggests an Italian name, “Vincitori” which means winners. No one likes it. Lisa Lampanelli suggests “Forte” another Italian word that means strong or strength, everyone loves it. Then they need a project manager and Patricia Velasquez volunteers. I was disappointed that neither Victoria or Teresa stepped up to throw their hat in the ring. I have to wonder why?

Off to the board room to meet Donald. The task is to make celebrity sandwiches and the project manager whose team makes the most money plus tips will get all the money made in this task from both teams, for their charity. The losing team loses a member.

Now they split up and the women have to decide what they are going to do next. Patricia suggests a carnival and Victoria says you need a permit in New York for that or the police will shut you down and that theme has nothing to do with sandwiches. Lisa Lampanelli says she will not disrespect Victoria, no matter what she says or does, because she has mob connections. They decide to create a Celebrity Club Room at a deli and the most recognizable person should be outside to draw a crowd to send in to buy sandwiches. That job falls on Teresa Giudice. Everyone calls up friends to donate money, however, they are all holding back because they want to save their calls for help for when they are project manager in the future.

They have lots to say, but do they deliver the goods?

At Café Metro, in the VIP lounge, the Celebrity Club room is set up. Teresa is in the kitchen making her secret recipe of red roasted peppers. While Victoria Gotti has not shown up for her team and isn’t answering her phone. I heard she slept in late, but later she claims that she had an accident with her eye and her cornea or retina was torn. I am not believing that, sorry. I want to see a doctor’s note. Everyone is a little ticked off at Victoria. A customer comes in saying he will pay $10,000 for a vegan sandwich. They have none, but Victoria quickly whips one up for $10,000 for him. No one gives her any credit for that. I thought she deserves some and that it made up for her being an hour late.

Next part of the task involves each team taking their best sandwich over to the Rachael Ray show for her to taste and pick a winner. The winning sandwich will get a bonus of $35,000. Lisa and Victoria show up with their Celebrity Club International Sandwich. However, the men’s team wins the challenge, according to Rachael.

Time to see who earned the most money. The women’s team earned a total of $126,962; the men’s team earned $332,120 plus the $35,000 bonus, bringing them up to $367,120. The men win, but it disturbs me and the women’s team too, that they got $305,000 just from one person. It’s doesn’t seem fair, but those are the rules.

Patricia has to decide which women were the weakest links on the team. She picks Cheryl Tiegs because she says she didn’t bring in any money; Cheryl disagrees. And she picks Victoria Gotti (as did a few others on the team), for not being a team player, showing up late and not answering her calls. No one said a word about firing Teresa at all. Lisa added that Victoria was heard making personal phone calls while she was supposed to be working. It’s time for Patricia to make a decision. She decides Cheryl is the weakest player and I agree. 

Whose team are you on? So far I'm losing!!!

Victoria came dangerously close to being fired on day one! No one complained at all about Teresa Giudice. Therefore, I have to say that Round 1 goes to Teresa, and Victoria comes out on the losing end. Very disappointed in Victoria Gotti. We’ll see if she bounces back next week. 

The Real Housewives of New Jersey: Reunion Part 2 Preview

Last week part 1 of The Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion special delivered its highest rated episode of the season and tonight’s episode looks just as EXPLOSIVE. 

Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga 

In a preview for tonight; Teresa Giudice is once again going head to head with Melissa Gorga after Host Andy Cohen asks Melissa about her marriage to Joe Gorga. “Was it a red flag that Joe was engaged 2X before he married you?” Melissa explains that Joe’s other fiancés couldn’t get along with Teresa and her family. SURPRISE SURPRISE!!!

   

 Watch Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New Jersey Sunday at 10/9c 

 Picture Video Credit: Bravo 

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The Real Housewives of New Jersey: The Reunion Episode

Kathy Wakile, Teresa Giudice, Andy Cohen, Caroline Manzo, Melissa Gorga
At the Count Basie Theater, Red Bank, New Jersey

The explosive 1st part of Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion airs tonight with all eyes on Teresa Giudice as she comes face to face with Caroline Manzo, Melissa Gorga, and Kathy Wakile; Jacqueline Laurita choose not to attend due to events that took place at the Porsche Fashion Show the day before the reunion was taped. 

In the clip with emotions running high when Melissa is asked about contacting ex-cast member Danielle Staub and the accusations fly.  With Caroline telling Teresa “Why don’t you shut up and listen?”  But Teresa doesn’t stop calling Melissa a devil saying “You’re the devil, I’m like looking at the exorcist right now.” Aiming her anger at Caroline next Teresa says “I said you never wanted to make up with my brother?” “You're a freaking liar” “No wonder why Dina doesn’t want to speak to you, like what happen to you?”   Dina Manzo, Caroline’s sister left the show in Season and rumors have circulated for months about Caroline’s strained relationship.  The rumors were never confirmed or denied by the sisters.  Until tonight when Caroline addresses the rumors   in the clip Caroline explains to Andy” I lost a lot of my relationship with her”.  “Over what?” asks Andy?  “I’m lookin at it” says Caroline glares at Teresa.    

 

Due to the Bravo "gag-order", the wives are forbidden to reveal any events before they are aired. But The Reunion Episode brings the wives back together for a NO-HOLDS BARRED recap of the seasons with Bravo executive Andy Cohen as the host. Previous Reunions included shoving matches and cast members to walk off the show. However, Bravo’s decision to film season 4 while airing season 3 has caused “REAL TIME DRAMA” to overshadow the taped events of the season currently airing.

Teresa calls sister in-law Melissa
"Devil" "A freaking Exorist"

In a first for Bravo TV; the producers simultaneously filmed and aired 2 Seasons at the same time. As Bravo taped the finale for Season 4 at the Posche Fashion on September 27th a confrontation between Melissa and Teresa over rumors of Melissa being a stripper caused a twitter war between Jacqueline and Teresa. “Teresa is scum,” Jacqueline wrote in a series of tweets, including that she won’t be a part of this season’s reunion. “I can’t be part of the Charade anymore,” she wrote. “It’s unsettling. It’s disturbing & against what I stand for. I’m a REAL housewife…No reunion for me. Sorry guys. XOXO!”

Unfortunately for Bravo, Jacqueline stood by her tweets and refused to tape the season 3 reunion on September 2th causing rumors that both Jacqueline and Caroline were fired, Bravo as denied these claims. In an interview with GMA Melissa said “I think in the reunion you’re going to see a lot of what’s going on right now.” Whatever the case maybe…THIS SURE MAKES FOR ONE HELL OF REUNION SPECIAL.

Watch Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New Jersey Sunday at 10/9c Picture Video Credit: Bravo 

All written content is exclusive property of The Mob Wives Blogspot and is protected by copyrights or other intellectual property rights. You are prohibited from using, copying, altering, modifying, or changing our work. Unauthorized use of this is strictly prohibited. Violators are punishable under federal law. In simple English, stop f*cking jacking our work.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey: The Punta Cana Fiasco Concludes

Bravo’s RHNJ returns us to the beach on Punta Cana where Teresa and Joe are walking away after Teresa’s confrontation with Kathy. As Teresa changes into her next gold/leopard ensemble Richie smooth things over with Joe who could really care less. Sitting back on the beach Kathy says to Jaqueline she didn't mean to say anything harmful, but she's going to leave it alone. After asking Jaq if she “OVERREACTED” Teresa returns to the group like nothing ever happened.

Nobody does “DENIAL” like Teresa!!!

The rest of the evening was surprisingly calm and even the Joes were getting along. Joe Giudice even announces to everyone that he's done being pissed off at Joe Gorga. "At the end of the day, we're family.

The next morning poor Melissa is again being molested by Joe "If you do it right, it takes three seconds!” he says in his relentless quest for more sex. "It's like always about Joe, like can I have my five minutes to wash my armpit?" a very annoyed Melissa asks the camera.


That afternoon the guys go golfing, if you can call it that. The Joes were acting like 2 juvenile delinquents with Joey Gorga pulling down his pants to moon the Manzo boys. But hey, at least they’re not killing each other right? Rich says Albert had another thing coming if he thought he could have a successful day on the course with "this bunch of clowns."

While the men golf, the women and Greg head out for an afternoon of “SHOPPING” but learn quickly it’s really so Teresa can do research for her new cookbook. Kathy still bitchy from the fight is quick to say "I personally would rather go golfing with Teresa so I could have a club" but insists, "I wouldn't hit her... I wouldn't.” But I’m not so sure about that…not after this trip! And off on their excursion they go…

***SIDEBAR: I have to interject here and no offense to the Dominicans but anyone whose ever been to Punta Cana knows why this this the most affordable island destination and it's not for quaint little shopping districts. You go for the warmth in the winter, the beaches, and great resorts. However, the Dominican is a very poor, 3rd world county and tourist are advised not to leave the resorts. If the ride from the airport doesn’t convince you than perhaps the warning from US State Department and WikiTravel will.

The Higuey Market is like some thing you would expect to see in Steven King masterpiece with cow heads, pig parts, and other various unrecognizable carcasses. There is blood dripping everywhere, and puddles running down the street. The ladies and my hero Greg are horrified, Melissa is screaming about her Gucci shoes that cost more than these people make in a month. This is not the Short Hills Mall it’s the Dominican Republic, WTF!

BUT THERE’S OUR TERESA … smiling for the camera proudly holding the dead, blood dripping offerings of the day heeding Melissa’s warnings until finally Caroline snaps "Stop making a spectacle of yourself. This isn't funny. Put it down." But when Teresa ventures into a store asking for spices from a man who clearing does not speak HER language, let alone the English language I’m convinced she is no long in touch with reality on ANY level as she asks him “Have you heard of my book Skinny Italian?” Not to mention her next remark about the day’s events "Maybe the market is not what the ladies really expected, but I think its great research, so get over it. That's why I'm a New York Times bestsellers author."

With exception to Albert, Caroline, Lauren, Jacqueline, and Christopher the rest of the cast was an embarrassment. It was insulting not only to the local people of the Dominican but as US citizens visiting their country. And, Bravo’s decision not to air footage or mention the fight that led to the arrest of Joe, Albie, Christopher, and Greg due to pending lawsuits doesn’t make this episode any more dignified. What do you think of the episode? Was I too judgmental of these crazy kids or could they behave a little better when out in public?

Watch Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New Jersey Sunday at 10/9c

Picture Video Credit: Bravo

All written content is exclusive property of The Mob Wives Blogspot and is protected by copyrights or other intellectual property rights. You are prohibited from using, copying, altering, modifying, or changing our work. Unauthorized use of this is strictly prohibited. Violators are punishable under federal law. In simple English, stop f*cking jacking our work.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey: Fashion, Fighting and Fallout!

Teresa Giudice of The Real Housewives of New Jersey with one of her mini mes.

Celebrations Event and Meeting Management, a tour company independent of Bravo TV, Bravo, or The Real Housewives of New Jersey has canceled The New Jersey Housewives Tour in light of all the drama that has happened over the past 3 days. Here is their official statement:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
September 29, 2011
RE: NJ HOUSEWIVES TOUR

Recent events in connection with the Bravo Real Housewives Series have prompted us to make the decision to discontinue the NJ Housewives Tour.

We have always been aware that the Real Housewives Series, like many reality shows, is edited for maximum viewing effect. While the show is not scripted, many of the scenarios and scenes are suggested to the cast members. And the way they play out is generally up to the cast. However, while talking with people who have taken part in the tapings of the show, it was becoming more and more apparent that Bravo in many instances chooses to provoke the drama that plays out on the show. The events that took place at this week’s taping of The Real Housewives of New Jersey appear to further prove that this is the case.

We do not want to take part in promoting a series that appears to value ratings and earnings over the importance of people, their families and their lives.

While we, like many, were fans of the show, and enjoyed seeing the places and locations that are familiar to us showcased on television, we do not enjoy watching people’s lives torn apart solely for ratings. These are real people with real lives and real families. We respect the cast and wish them well with their future endeavors.

NJ Housewives Tour

Bravo’s The Real Houseswives of New Jersey were not playing nice this week.  It may of all started at the Porsche Fashion Show. What took place between then and now is still a little unclear but this is what I get from the texts & twitter beef.

• Teresa was met at the salon before the show by man asking questions about Melissa. Asking if Melissa was a stripper before marrying Joe Gorga.
• During the show the same man showed up at the show as did Teresa.  He conveniently confronted Melissa on her alleged stripper past.  The man by the way is or was the manager of the club.
• Melissa went running to the Manzo’s for protection very upset that this guy was there.
• Caroline and Jacqueline had already cut Teresa out of their lives.  They believe Teresa is behind the guy's appearance.
• Jacqueline was furious and the twitter war began. Jacqueline called out Teresa and blamed her for the set up. Teresa denied everything.
• Ironically during all this a photo of Joe Giudice with another woman is released thru Radar Online.
• Teresa sent Jacqueline text messages accusing her of leaking the photos and Jacqueline posted the texts on twitter. Apparently Teresa did not want to have this all on twitter.
• Melissa takes to her blog and claims that she was a bartender not a stripper for a few months.
• All this time Teresa is claiming she still had no idea this guy was showing up.  Jacqueline says “Teresa is Scum” and that she told her about this before season 3 started.
• The drama is all too much for Jacqueline.  She's conveniently is too sick to attend the reunion show for season 3 which conveniently is being shot the day after the fashion show by Bravo. A short while later Jacqueline announces she “QUIT”
• Teresa who doesn’t seem to have a care in the world let alone this…spent the day at the beach with her daughters according to her twitter.

It is one thing to have fighting among the wives, it’s what they do. But for independent companies making a profit to pull out is something else. It also seems a bit shady that Bravo scheduled filming for the fashion show the night before the reunion. ….Hmmmmm. Whether the producers at Bravo are pure genius or just evil trouble makers; you can’t deny this sure makes for good TV, not to mention blogging. What do you all think?

Picture Credits: Bravo, Celebrations, Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga

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The Real Housewives of New Jersey: Melania Guidice's 5th Birthday!

What a beautiful family!

On the next episode of The Real Housewives of New Jersey it’s Milania's 5th birthday! Teresa and Joe Giudice have invited everyone to Giuseppe Home Style Pizzeria; the eatery they own in Hillside, NJ.



It’s nice to see everyone together and SURPRISE Joe Giudice actually comes across as a “nice guy” making pizza’s with the kids. But everyone's on edge when Joe Gorga and Richie Wakile are outside joking about his missing tooth to an untrusting Kathy Wakile explaining “I don’t know what kind of mood Juicy’s in at this point. There’s some tension, but I hope they know it takes a lot more strength and self-control to walk away then go in there and fight” But that’s easier said than done after Joe Giudice’s recent threats of violence. It isn’t until Gia sings to Milania that all the ill feelings disappear and for a brief moment they are once again a family undivided.

Catch Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New Jersey Sunday at 10/9c on September 11!  It's a holiday weekend so no new episodes with of good ole' family values with the Manzos, Gorgas, Guidices, Lauritas and Wakiles.

How many new faces would you like to see join the season 2 cast of Mob Wives? Check out our poll and cast your vote. It's up top on the right so don't forget.

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Picture & Video Credit: Bravo

The Real Housewives of New Jersey: Teresa and Joe, Somethings Gotta Give

This episode of The Real Housewives of New Jersey showcases the alarming behavior of Teresa and Joe Giudice. The first time we see Teresa is at Jacqueline’s house wearing a purple, full length, fake fur coat. Now, come on, I don’t care how flashy you’re trying to be this is definitely a Glamour DON’T; unless of course, you're Katy Perry.

We next see Teresa buying groceries with Milania and Audriana all dolled up and I gotta give Tee credit. When I took my kids to the grocery store I was happy if they had matching shoes on. Just saying… As soon as Teresa enters the store she starts telling us she only cooks healthy with NOT a lot of “ingredientses” However, looking at her cart in the frozen food isle and Milania demanding a “Kids Cuisine” it’s clear they eat like the rest of us. Teresa then decides to call her brother and invite him to her “Skinny Italian” book signing, why she chose to do this with 2 babies in a store is beyond me. As she’s talking to Joe Gorga Milania climbs into the refrigerated case, crushes the fresh prepared salads and not until Teresa is done talking to does she go help her while praising this child for her “good behavior”. I don’t get it… I would have been humiliated and my child would be in the car with a sore little bottom.

After Joe Gorga accepts his sisters’ invitation he starts to receive threating text messages from Joe Giudice. He tells Melissa about the threatening texts from his brother in-law. Telling Melissa that Joe Giudice is threatening to break his jaw then wire it shut, calling Joey and his wife fake and saying they’re only attending this book signing for “show”. Melissa adds that while her husband works very hard from sun up to sun down, Joe Giudice calls the working man a sucker. Does Joe Giudice have any redeeming qualities?

The night of the book signing Joe and Melissa show up late but it was probably for the best. When they get there Teresa is happy and introduces them to the owner. Joe then buys 10 copies of “Skinny Italian” and asked his sister to inscribe one for him. This was a very awkward moment but the most “REAL” moment this season in my opinion. She stumbles for the right words and Joe says "From your heart, let's go," Joe then makes her read it out loud as Teresa starts to cry. Joe gives her a quick hug, but not what Teresa was expecting and Joe tells her why he’s upset. He doesn't appreciate getting threatening texts from her husband and she responds saying her husband is upset too. But it was just Teresa making more excuses she just doesn’t GET IT!

Teresa returns home to her very drunk husband and a houseful of guests. Joe Giudice was loud, he was obnoxious, and an embarrassment to his children. When Joe chips his tooth doing drunken summersaults Gia freaks out. And what does Teresa do? She downplays the whole thing explaining when Joe drinks things get out of control. But next at the table Teresa confronts her husband about the texts and Joe goes into a tirade about the Gorga’s. It’s just escalated from there and after Teresa tries defending her brother he tells her to “SHUT UP”. Joe goes further humiliating Teresa by telling everyone he dumped Teresa before they were married due to her brothers’ friendship with one of Teresa’s ex-boyfriends. Joe than adds Teresa begged him to take her back.


Everyone is guilty of stirring the pot and causing this dysfunction, shame on each of them. But I now believe Joe Giudice is the root cause of the bad blood. He is emotionally abusive (and I pray not physical) man who will destroy his family before he takes responsibility for his actions. Anyone who grew up in a home fueled by drugs and alcohol knows what this is doing to their daughters. I feel bad for Teresa but as long as she chooses her husband over EVERYTHING else she accepts some of the responsibility for this situation.

Watch Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New Jersey Sunday at 10/9c
Picture Credit: Bravo

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The Real Housewives of NJ: A Reality Stars “REALITY”

Very little time was devoted to the Giudice’s last week except for the opening where a photography crew was taking shots for her latest cookbook “Fabulicious”. The scene was chaotic to say the least and the girls were in no mood for another staged family moment. What was interesting was Teresa’s interview where she says they're putting their bankruptcy behind them and moving on with their lives. "This year is going to be amazing," she says.


This week we follow Joe and Teresa to their lawyer’s office to hear the Judge’s ruling regarding the $260,000 lawsuit filed by Joseph Mastropole, Joe Giudice’s ex-partner. U.S. Bankruptcy Court Judge Morris Stern sided with Joseph Mastropole, saying that the $260,000 debt should be accepted from the Giudice’s' bankruptcy due to fraud and willful and malicious injury to property. U.S. Bankruptcy Court Judge Morris Stern’s letter of opinion can be read
HERE.



According to Teresa they’re in this predicament because Joe told the truth about forging his ex-partner’s signature on a loan. Saying "Wow, you just can't trust anyone anymore," adding "It's pretty sad." "So in other words, never tell the truth," Joe says. "See," Teresa tell us. "You got to lie!" Then Teresa starts babbling about her Jewish friends who told her they would have divorced Joe in a second.

TERESA, STOP IT!  Yes I am blog yelling. Someone could be facing jail time because of this mess! Teresa is old school when it comes to marriage and defending her husband.  I get that! One has to wonder how long she continue this charade of everything is alright.
Joe is looking at as much as 10 years after his arrest in March 2011 for fraudulently obtaining a state driver's license. Giudice's license was suspended last year following a conviction for drunk driving, which landed him in jail for 10 days in September 2010 after it was discovered he was driving at that time on a suspended license.

Teresa explains her comments during her meeting with the lawyer on her blog at BravoTV.com but it’s just more rambling from someone not in touch with reality.

Teresa and Joe were originally due to appear in court to face allegations of bankruptcy fraud on July 14, 2011, but the proceedings have been postponed.

It’s hard to see the forest thru the trees…
The Giudice’s are on borrowed time and it’s hard watching someone who is in this much denial. I almost feel bad for them. But then it’s clear as day they’ve created their own demise, not only that but to act so judgment while forgetting their own morals. I say it all the time, Karma is REAL and no matter how much they deserve their fate, it’s never enjoyable to watch. Let me know what you think, and how you would handle it differently.

Watch Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New Jersey Sunday at 10/9c

All written content is exclusive property of The Mob Wives Blogspot and is protected by copyrights or other intellectual property rights. You are prohibited from using, copying, altering, modifying, or changing our work. Unauthorized use of this is strictly prohibited. Violators are punishable under federal law. In simple English, stop f*cking jacking our work.

Picture Video Credit: Bravo, Radar Online

Mob Wives: Auld Lang Syne for an Eye Recap

The tension between Teresa Giudice and every single other living soul in North Jersey has been at a slow boil since Christmas but this week starts very calm, almost to calm. Mama Manzo is hosting her Sunday night radio show “Caroline Rules” at New Jersey 101.5 (F*cK, NOT NY, NOT PHILA intro is in my head) and the topic; resolutions and new beginnings. And as fate would have it…Our little blinged out Melissa just happens to be in her BIG blinged out SUV listening to Caroline say in her best Marlon voice “DON’T LET ANYONE INTIMIDATE YOU – ESPECIALLY IF YOUR DOING SOME THING PURE IN YOUR HEART” There was a tear running down my cheek…or was it sweet from the hot flashes?

At that moment, MiniMel calls Teresa and invites them over for a play date. Now, I have to give Melissa credit she extended the olive branch even if she does want to beat her with it instead. And even if this is just a front to bait Tee and bring up Kathy Walike, she seems genuine in getting the cousins together. Teresa attitude on the phone was nothing less than rude as she rambles about her stomach flu and busy life.

Jacqueline Laurita is desperate trying to find anyone who can reason with her 20 year old daughter Ashley. Why she hasn’t grabbed that girl by her hair and slapped her into next Tuesday is beyond me. I know violence is never the answer, but WTF! Jacqueline pleads with her parents for help and sends Grandpop Jerry to perform the exorcism. He comes in to find the little Angel sketching Marilyn Monroe. After a few awkward seconds he compliments her art, and suggests a career using her drawings. THE GIRL GOT SOME MAD SKILLS.

Caroline calls the Kathy Wakile extends an invitation for the New Year’s Eve celebration at the Brownstone. Kathy sounds genuine and appreciative for the invite but doesn’t want to make things awkward. Caroline say’s “I like to think that we’re all adults and we can get together in a room and just have a good time and act appropriately.” She has been part of the first 2 seasons, right?

Blah Blah Blah, Lauren Manzo starting a beauty bar in the Chateau Salon & Spa. Ashley designs some shirts for her. Lauren doesn’t like them. Ashley has attitude. Blah Blah Blah

It’s the afternoon of the play date the Gorga kids Antonia and Gino are ready for some serious play time. BUT WAIT, OH HELL NO! Princess Antonia is dressed in a sweater with a purse on the front with the iconic C’s. The only Chanel I’ve ever had was bought was from a guy on Chanel Street behind the Starbucks.

At Teresa’s the girls are running wild. Milania is tossing all her cloths on the floor. Tee calls her a Terror and says this is why she’s late! Really Tee? 3 hours later, they arrive at Aunt Melissa’s like they each had 2 Red Bulls on the way over. Let me point out they live maybe 5 minutes away.

Melissa being a lot more gracious then I’d be welcoming guest that are 3 hours late offers some chicken cutlet, Teresa snaps back they’re on their way to dinner. It's clear Teresa is on Edge! She looks uncomfortable and out of place and it shows in in her whole appearance. She looks rough! Naturally, she passes on Melissa’s offer of spritzer or water and asks for wine (Mother’s little liquid helper) to relax. Gia (Love the Fedora), Teresa, and Melissa finally sit down and Melissa immediately brings up Kathy Wakile. Melissa accuses Teresa of being nasty towards Kathy at the Brownstone. Teresa says Kathy started it saying ““Now we’ve become distant, now she’s your buddy,” and “Meanwhile I’m your sister-in-law, but that’s fine.” (Sure Tee, you’re that secure). Then she blames all this on Kathy for not having her in her wedding 20yrs ago. Richie and his constant insults and obsession also caused the problem. Really? But Melissa say’s Joe is guilty of making cracks about Kathy’s weight but Teresa won’t have Joe-Rilla’s good name being slandered like this and says “What’s the big deal?” adding “That’s Joe’s opinion.”

The conversation moves on to Teresa’s new “family” cookbook. Melissa offers some “family” recipes. “No,” Teresa says. “Do you have any?” “We all know that bitch doesn’t cook,” Teresa tells us. Melissa is just as busy in her new (cough cough) recording studio and album. Teresa’s comeback “I have to say, nowadays anybody can be singer,” using Kim Kardashian as an example. OUCH! Teresa’s was a total Bee-Otch at Melissa’s and her made herself look like a jealous, vengeful, unhappy, housewife on the verge of a mental breakdown. This only makes Melissa look BETTER. Who would’ve thought our little Mini Mel would take the high road. BUT…is this real? I know Tee is off her rocker this season but my suspicions about Melissa just won’t go away. Hmmmmm

At Teresa’s it’s the normal chaos. And then it happened! What will be the Quote of season 3 if not every season of every Bravo Housewife franchise is uttered from the mouth of Babes. “Gimme pizza, you old troll,” Milania says her father. Who does in fact look like an old troll. CLASSIC! Cut to Teresa. “I love that the girls are old enough to go to this party,” Teresa tells us. “They’re so well-behaved, and as a mom, that makes me feel so proud.”

The New Year’s Eve party at the Brownstone is in full swing. Teresa is with Caroline and Jacqueline explaining that even though Joe and Melissa came over Christmas Eve she is now upset because they left to go to Kathy’s. Jacqueline and Caroline don’t see this as an insult and then Caroline tells Tee she invited the Wakile’s. Caroline says “I didn’t want to get sucked into a problem with Kathy and all that,” Teresa’s face is priceless. But I call foul on this too. This is a family party and never in the 20 years of the Wakile’s being were customers they ever invited before. Caroline also stated in the beginning of the season she didn’t know them. So what is it? Does she know them or not, are they family not family, WHAT GIVES MAMA MANZO.

The Wakile’s naturally arrive with homemade cookies to give to their hostess. I think it’s odd! Do they know it’s a catered event? It’s a very nice thought but a little odd for this type of party. As the Wakile’s are saying hello to everyone Teresa walks off and tells us Kathy’s only interested in cooking because of the success of her cookbook. Is Teresa jealous of everyone and really this insecure? Tee maybe the Zoloft need to be re adjusted?

Joe Gorgeous is doing what he does best…being gorgeous, upbeat, enjoying himself as he pours drinks behind the bar. Joe-Rilla being the only way he knows how…A BIG F*CKING DOUCH BAG. Yells to his brother in-law “Hey punk-ass, get me a drink!” Chris Laurita hears this and looks mortified. It seems Mr. Gorgeous doesn’t hear his sister’s loser husband or simply takes the high road. When F*uck Face sees Richie he greets him with “Mr. Dickface.” Kathy claims that this “banter” is typical but I get the feeling it’s not.

The ladies wind up together to chat while Kathy is out enjoying herself. Somehow Kathy got the gene that avoids drama. Melissa tells Teresa she’s glad that she’s okay with Kathy being there. Teresa says she’s only happy because it’s New Year’s. “Let’s get real,” Melissa says. “You’re happy that we’re all together?” Then Melissa points out that Kathy is actually Teresa’s blood, not Melissa’s. “But she put a bad taste in my blood,” Teresa says. OMG, who says that? IT’S TASTE IN MY MOUTH; I know I say it a lot for some reason too.

Melissa suggests they take a vacation to Punta Cana. “You go on vacation with people that you want to hang out with,” Teresa says. Caroline thinks it will be nice. Teresa says she can’t forgive Kathy for her actions at the christening. How dare Kathy pull Teresa’s kids into another room when Mommy and Daddy want to bitch slap the hosts. “You said to me at Jacqueline’s house that family is most important to you,” Melissa points out to a confused Teresa. “This is your family.” Melissa tells her and then invites Jacqueline and Caroline to go with them. Caroline predictably accepts. Jacqueline says “I want to be there for Teresa and I want to see her end this with her family,” and adds “I know it can be easily resolved if Teresa wasn’t so stubborn.” I have to call you out on this one Jacq’s. You just want to feel included and this is the only way you can have any relevance to the drama happening this season. Christopher is going to be thrilled!

Kathy who is now the only sane person left at this party goes over to Teresa and says she didn't get the chance to wish her a Happy New Year! Teresa’s response...We did on the dance floor like she was having a flash back to the Danielle Days.

Like a scene out of a move, the camera pans back to Caroline looking over all her little disciples. In a hallmark moment her voiceover is played wishing all their little dreams come true…

It all ends with Richie saying “New Year, Same Shit.” God, I heart the Wakile’s.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey are on Sunday’s at 10/9c on Bravo. Don't forget to vote! Our latest poll on the right at the top. We love to hear what our readers think!!!!

The Real Housewives of New Jersey: Can Gia Eat Her Cutlet?

So, I stroll over to BravoTV.com to check out what goodies they have for me to share with you the reader. Lucky me, I found a preview video or two that caught my eye. Teresa Lays Down the Law was a goodie. It takes place @ The Gorgas 15,000+ square foot Jersey mansion. What a life?! Melissa has invited her sister-in-law Teresa Guidice with her mini mes over for a play date w/ their Gorga cousins. All seems well, Teresa requests wine instead of the offered seltzer or water. Cousins are playing with dolls. Cousins are jumping amok in a bouncer. All is well with the kids! We watch the uncomfortable dance of Melissa & Teresa as they try to play cordial for the sake of their family.


Frankly, the kids seem more mature than these once upon a time feuding in-laws. Gia Guidice tells her Auntie Mel that she's hungry. Once Gia given a chicken cutlet to grub down, Melissa initiates a conversation with Teresa about Kathy Wakile. If you didn't know allow me to fill you in Kathy is Teresa's first cousin. They aren't exactly seeing eye to eye right about now. Melissa is best friends with Kathy. Teresa is clearly uncomfortable with their closeness and the direction of the conversation. She doesn't want Gia's ears to hear what is about to be said. She instructs Gia to leave the room. Gia devouring her chicken cutlets is disgruntled and doesn't want to leave. Teresa lays down the law telling her to leave. Watch for yourself...



If one is trying to rebuild a relationship why bring up a third party? Do you think Melissa was right to bring up Kathy? Do you think Teresa was a meanie mom for making Gia leave the room starved? Let us know, we'd love to read your opinions in the comments. I don't know about you, but I am dying for the next episode of The Real Housewives of New Jersey to air. Watch AULD LANG SYNE FOR AN EYE on Sunday, August 7 @ 10PM Eastern/Pacific on Bravo.

Real Housewives of NJ-Parenting and Kids

Albert & Caroline Manzo with Lauren, Chris and Albie

Watching reality TV, I can’t help but be amazed at some of these kids. It seems either they’re fantastic, or I wanna reach through the screen and smack ‘em.

Let’s take a look at the RHONJ kids and their parents.

Caroline: My favorite NJ housewife, who raised 2 wonderful sons who don’t mind working hard. But then there’s Lauren. Every time I see Lauren, I see a very poised, intelligent person who seems to never get as much credit from Caroline as the sons do. Middle child stigma? Italian mother favoring the sons stigma? Or is Caroline just being harder on Lauren to make her a stronger woman? We, of course, never know all the details but I wish Lauren would get more kudos.

Jacqueline: Oh, brother. How did such a classy person end up with a daughter like Ashley who is the Queen of Manipulation? Chris buys her a new Jeep because he loves the kid. He will co-sign and pay the first 2 payments. Ashley knew to not involve Jacqueline in this because Jacqueline would say no. Ashley apparently manipulated Chris into doing just that as well. But, of course!, Ashley claims. She deserves a new Jeep because she is working part time and interning! But when Chris wants to take the 2nd set of keys, and wants to take the Jeep to get coffee later, that little witch has the nerve to say no??? I yelled at the screen so loud, my dog ran under my desk. My blood pressure is going up as I type, so on to the next kid…

Joe & Teresa Guidice with all four of their girls.

Teresa: Can you say “oblivious”? With all the crap that her family is putting her sister-in-law Melissa through, Teresa makes me want to scream sometimes. Ok, not as much as Danielle did, but still…She put her family in the poor house with all her spending and never thought a thing of it. I’m glad Teresa finally asked her brother Joe what she could do to make things better with Melissa. Again, Caroline had to step in and tell her to make it right. Teresa didn’t like that because she feels she is an adult and doesn’t need advice like that. But Teresa is so childish, it now makes me very concerned for Gia. It was evident at the gymnastics meet how much Gia loves her Uncle Joe. I’m afraid when Joe Giudice has to go to jail for trying to obtain a license using false ID, Teresa will never have the maturity to raise those kids alone. Gia will suffer the most because she is the most aware of what’s going on. She is a great kid who has a big heart and loves her family. You can see it in Gia’s eyes that she is wise beyond her years. I love it when she rolls her eyes at something Teresa does because I’m sure 99% of the watchers of the show are doing the same thing at the same time.

Rich & Kathy Wakile with Victoria and Joseph (my favorite Bravo kid <3!

Kathy: Great parenting by Kathy and Rich. Their kids Victoria and Joseph have a solid relationship with their parents, as evidenced by the contract segment. I’m sure that because Victoria had to go through such a traumatic time when she had brain surgery to remove a tumor the size of a tennis ball, that the event made her grow up rather quickly. She seems like a great kid and I liked her right away. I love the relationship that she and Joseph have. But Joseph himself? He is my FAVORITE RHONJ kid! He has the most wonderful smile and sense of humor, loves his sister and is honest with his parents. He has that Ralph Macchio personality and every time I see the repeat of the contract episode, I find myself wearing a huge ear to ear grin because this kid just makes me laugh. I know that Kathy said people think she is too overprotective of her kids, but if those kids turned out like that, I think NOT! Great parenting.

Of course, we only see fragments of their lives and I’m sure much gets edited out. It’s tough being in the public eye. But I feel, for the most part, these kids help make the show as much fun to watch as it is watching their mothers.

Photo credit: BravoTV.com

Watch What Happens Live: RHONJ's Teresa and Jacqueline

"Watch What Happens Live" just aired Monday night. The guests on the show were Teresa Giudice and Jacqueline Laurita of "The Real Housewives of New Jersey". Off in my head, I am thinking 'after such an explosive episode of RHONJ, we'd be in for some fireworks.' Teresa is always good for few jabs especially when there is liquor involved.   However no Giudice!  Teresa was very tame and ladylike.  She seemed very sad about the christening gone wild and her deteriorating relationship with her brother Joe Gorga.  It was a fairly subdued show.

Let me digress for a bit. I love Andy Cohen. He is an entertaining host.  He really keeps the conversation going. I do have a bit of man crush on Andy. He is not the most attractive man but he does have charisma and some appeal. Just to clear things up I am heterosexual.  I am secure enough to share if I were homosexual; Andy would most likely be my type of guy.

Last night, Teresa looked really. It is probably the first time that I found myself attracted to her. She wore this sequined black dress.  She filled it out very nicely. The thing that put her dress over the top was her shoes. Maybe I am a sucker for sparkly shoes. Her silver & black shoes were on point.  I can almost see why Joe fathered four children with her.

Jacqueline, oh Jacqueline! She can do no wrong. I have to type that I have never truly paid attention to her legs. Man they looked great. Jacqueline wore a purple one shouldered sparkly dress which definitely suited her. Of course I know that Jacqueline fits my type of woman. So I have always found her to be the best looking on the show. Andy did bring up that she is looking better and asked her about any plastic surgery. I guess her beauty is too much for some. Of course as any proper woman would reply, she denied any surgery.

With both on the show I thought there'd be fireworks as I stated earlier. However, the only sparklers were their dresses and Teresa's shoes. Andy introduced a clip from the show discussing the Gorga switch. This is an interesting concept because it does describe Teresa perfectly. She hears something that pisses her off and she flips. This is where I can relate to Teresa. I also have that switch especially when I have stupid people in my mist. I go off and many people do not stand a chance when I flip my switch.  Standing 6' 4" helps.

Andy played a games called "Faida Della Famiglia" which translates to Family Feud in Italian. Nick, Andy's camera man from New Jersey was the one person that was surveyed. Nick could easily fit in with the cast of Jersey Shore. The girls had to match Nick's answers in order to win. They were asked several New Jerseyesque questions. The best question was the top Jersey name for a boy. Teresa answered Joe.  My wife Chris Laurita's wife answered Joey. What made the question funny was the answers Nick gave. Both Tony and Anthony were in his top five which makes total sense because Tony isn't short for Anthony. Oh wait, I just remembered Tony is short for Anthony. I guess that is why Nick is a camera guy on the show and not a brain surgeon. Of course my girl Jacqueline won the game and was given a Taylor Ham.  Check out the video clip for yourself!



See the game was funny.  The most exciting thing that happened on the show was that Jacqueline was asked a question about her daughter Ashley. Jacqueline decided that she would hide her ham in her dress. It stuck out like a penis. As she tried to answer the question, we were brought down to her crotch.  Of course Teresa decided that she would play with. It was a bit funny. She also deflected the question because it keeps us watching the show. 

Overall, the show was not as exciting as it could've been.  I am about to rewind my DVR just so I can watch Jacqueline again. Teresa for once did not air out her business too much. I commend her for it. Thanks Andy for keeping the show going because it was a bit slow. Thanks Jacqueline for wearing that dress. 

Credit: Bravotv.com

The Housewives of New Jersey:Joe G. vs Joe G.

Premiere Episode - Season 3

Now I hate to admit it but I am a sucker for "The Real Housewives of New Jersey." I was eagerly sitting watching the first episode.  As I watched, I was intrigued by the one of the newest housewives, Melissa Gorga, the loving sister-in-law of Teresa Giudice. Melissa looks like she may have just turned 18. It's a compliment to her but it would make her husband a bit of a pedophile (not really 18 years old is legal). The focus seemed to be on Mrs. Gorga. I could not help but think, 'This is a girl who is starved for attention and needs validation through being liked.' It is human nature to want to be liked and to be the best for some people. But it seems one of two of the newest Housewives of New Jersey is trying too hard. I mean way hard.  The other new addition to the show is Kathy Wakile.

The show starts @ The Manor.  I guess this is a fancy establishment or something.  Teresa Giudice with husband Joe and kids are all dressed up.  Boy that family can dress!  Walking in Teresa asks how his stomach is holding up.  We see a sign welcoming guests to the christening celebration for Guiseppe Gorga.  Seconds later we see Teresa approaching her brother & sister-in-law's table.  She congratulates them.  Her brother tells her to step away from the table and then tells her she's garbage. What the hell?

The screen goes dark, I read, One week earlier.  Thank you  Bravo!  I was lost in the sauce.  Now we are @ the Giudice's pizza place.  It's packed and called Giuseppe's Homestyle Pizzeria!  Can I get a slice?  Joe is slinging pizzas and talking to one of his employees.  Teresa is looking stylish as ever.  Bankruptcy hasn't hurt her at all in the looks department.  Next she's sits down for a book signing of her best seller cookbook "Skinny Italian".  Gia, Caroline Manzo and Jacqueline Laurita show up to support their friend, castmate and mother.  The Guidices appear to be doing all right.

Next we get to check on the progress with the Manzos.  If there were ever a Cleaver family of reality television, I think the Manzos would be it.  Caroline with husband and adult children in tow are looking @ an apartment.  I see a spin off show in the very, very near future.  If this isn't a prepping of the viewer for the "Boys to Manzos", I don't know what is.  I wish them success.  The boys are showing off their apartment to their doting mother, father Albert and sister Lauren.  We learn that Albie's law school dreams have been put out.  He looking forward to moving on and out.  Caroline's funny baby boy Christopher will be moving in with his older brother.  Remember the Manzos are thick as thieves.  So though we know Caroline is proud, we see her pain of letting 2 out of 3 of her babies go.  Say or write whatever you want about that woman, she is a good mother.  The Manzos appear to still be solid as a rock as a family.

I get to see the New Jersey Housewife I fancy the most next, Jacqueline Laurita.  Mrs. Laurita I have to remind myself this woman is married is on her way to visit her oldest child@ work .  Ashley is an intern for none other than Lizzie Grubman.  Jacqueline meets Lizzie.  She casually mentions in front of Jacqueline that Ashley needs to work on showing up to work.  Ashley whines about not having a car.  Ashley whines about commuting being expensive.  Ashley then mentions about wanting to move to New York.  Lizzie is just standing there like, "Okay."  Jacqueline asks her how she plans on affording the move.  As if Jacqueline can hear me I say, "You know she expects step daddy to foot the bill!"  Ashley says they can talk about it over lunch.  At lunch Jacqueline's husband is waiting for his wife and Ashley.  He instantly knows something has gone wrong.  My wife His wife, his wife, his wife fills him in.  He gives his stepdaughter some solid advice with Jacqueline chiming in.  The tears fall.  A mother feeling not heard excuses herself from the table.  I have an Ashley of my own.  So, I feel the Lauritas pain.

Next Teresa & Jacqueline are having a chat @ a local park.  Teresa shares how her brother has drifted from her, since he married Melissa.  People warned her.  Jacqueline thinks she should try to talk to her brother about it.  Besides the distance between her sibling, her own family's financial situation was a blow to her.  She shares that she didn't know about how bad it was, until Joe told her they needed to go to the lawyer's office.  Jacqueline tells her that she'll get through both the financial and brother situation.  Teresa sees the light at the end of the tunnel.

All right people, it's time for us to be introduced to the new blood.  First up is Melissa Gorga.  She is living the American dream.  She's spoiled.  Her and Joe have been married for 6 years.  She's in a sparkling blue dress when she asks him to lotion her legs.  He asks to lotion her butt cheeks.  He knows they are dry.  I laugh.  She brags how her husband showed her the plans for their 15,000 square foot home.  And Teresa never told her that her home was beautiful.  She states that Joe expects a home cooked meal every night.  The kids must be clean.  There are to be no dishes in the sink.  Joe says his wife is his hero.  Good for them, really no sarcasm here. Still @ the Gorgas we hear how happy they are to bring their last son into God's Kingdom.

Conveniently the door bell rings, and it's #2 of the new blood the Housewives of New Jersey clan.  It's Kathy Wakile, Teresa & Joe's first cousin.  Melissa shares that Kathy and her have a close relationship, more like sisters.  Kathy is her go to person.  As they eat lunch Kathy asks about Teresa.  The negativity starts. 

Next we get to see Kathy's home.  We see her in the kitchen with her husband Rich.  She shares a story about her father realizing he isn't Italian.  Not that it matters to me, he is Lebanese.  I would type some of my best friends are Lebanese.  Frankly I don't know what the ethnic background of my friends.  I don't ask. I don't care. Kathy rides her bike to the market.  Once inside she mentions that women are afraid of vegetables.  What the fuck?  We find out she has two kids Victoria and Joseph.  They are good looking kids.  Kathy is either a filler just an extra New Jersey wife or instigator.

We are back @ the Manzos.  Christopher is doing his Cajun voice which is gibberish.  Albie gets lectured on keeping Christopher in line. Good luck!

We are back @ the Gorgas.  Folks are getting ready for the christening. Trust me when I type more Gorgas means more dramatics for one of Bravo's hottest fist pumping shows. The whole storyline focuses on  Melissa and Joe Gorga's christening of their baby boy. I am not Catholic. I do have plenty of Catholic family members. So, I have been to a few christenings. This should be a happy time for celebration with family and friends.

I never thought you should get tipsy prior to going to church.  However, the classy parents of baby Joey drink champagne, beers and get table pounding happy. Maybe they thought the church roof would fall down on top of them.  Alcohol does have a numbing affect, no? Frankly I do not mind the "feel no pain" attitude. However, I might do the same if my whole life seemed to be devoted to keeping up with the Jones & one upping them.

We are back @ the Guidices who are getting ready for the christening.  Gia has a gymnast competition that she can't miss.  She'll missed part of the celebration.  I might add now, not the part she should have missed.  Joe Giudice is lagging in the garage.  The poor guy is sick.  Every reader sing and clap with me, "Diarrhea (clap, clap), diarrhea  (clap, clap) people think it's funny but it's really wet and runny. Diarrhea (clap, clap), diarrhea (clap, clap) no pain no gain just let it drain."

The premiere episode of "The Real Housewives of New Jersey" season 3 seems to be all about the competition between the Gorgas and Guidices. There is some underlying resentment that was touched on in the episode. Teresa and her brother Joe were close once upon a time.  Jealousy appears to have divided the siblings. If you ask me the source of the division is Melissa Gorga. Remember earlier I stated that she looked 18. She acts like an 18 year old mean girl.  Melissa's goals may be to compete for attention and causing problems, specifically for Teresa. Teresa has never been a favorite of mine but I feel bad for her. She has a husband who tries to do right by her.  Joe Guidice may or may not be honest about how much money they did not have. Or maybe she doesn't listen.  Women why do you not listen?  Back to the money situation or the lack of it, I do understand the ridicule they received for filing bankruptcy.  We watch them for two seasons live in a mansion and shop up a New Jersey snow storm.  I even remember Teresa say that buying a preowned home was gross or something of that nature.  Honesty I don't know the details of their finances.  So, I'll write Mr. Guidice should've put his foot down; told his feisty wife to stop shopping; or told her, 'Honey the money tree has been pruned!' 

Joe Gorga, we learn is a hard working man. He is a big money developer which affords his family a certain lifestyle. He seems to have his wife on a short leash. She cooks, cleans and takes care of the kids. I guess that is a good thing. In the episode, we find out that the two Joes grew up together and were close. Joe Giudice looked after his father-in-law while he was sick. Joe Gorga was working. The entire episode we heard that Joe Giudice is lazy and Joe Gorga is a hard-working man according to Melissa.  Huh, since when is taking care of a sick in-law a lazy move?

As the episode goes along we are finally brought full circle. We're brought back to The Manor were it all went down.  I cannot call it a reception because everybody in attendance was looking like they were regulars at 13th Ave Pub in Lynnwood, Washington on a Friday night. I guess I am getting off topic again. I have tendency to ramble but I do have a point.

At the christening celebration, we see Joe Gorga getting blitzed with his friends. He asks Joe Giudice to have a drink. He declines.  Allow me to remind you that Mr. Giudice is suffering from bubble guts. This refusal is the trigger to the drama. Teresa and Joe are trying to be cordial which for them seems to be a challenge. I can appreciate they did not make the event about them. They even danced with their beautiful nephew. They respected the family. I can't write the same about the Gorgas.  Did they learn their etiquette from the high school lunch room?

Teresa goes up to Melissa and Joe to congratulate them. Drunk Joe and immature Melissa ask why is she doing it now. They basically disrespected their sister and sister-in-law. Joe Gorga calls Teresa garbage. Now I am a man.  If someone in my family called my wife garbage, I would be ready to kill them. Joe Gorga does decide to address the situation. Of course nothing happened really just a bunch of cussing and grabbing. I heard someone yell, "Gun!"  I also saw a group of numb nuts seem to try to keep the patriarch of the Gorga clan away from his son.  Who are these goons?  Is this Mob Wives?

I am of the opinion that Melissa Gorga is the root of all the bullshit this episode.  She seems jealous of Teresa. Melissa drove a wedge between the siblings and created this friction between the Joes. Now if you can remember earlier, I made the claim that Melissa looks about 18. I am sure she is older but she is really immature. She needs all the attention. The sad thing is that Teresa and her are one in the same. The season should be interesting. We should see how this drama unfolds. Until the end, I will be watching.  At the end of this episode my thoughts were:

It was primarily Joe G. versus Joe G.  episode 1 of season 3 of The Real Housewives of New Jersey.  I think Teresa, Jacqueline and Caroline won.  They handled themselves well this episode.  I had the nerve to think this series would be boring without the seemingly narcissistic, lying, crying, former stripper Danielle Staub.

Credit: Bravo