Do you know the difference between shopping
around and bidding war?
“Give Up The Ghostwriter” is the title of this episode. Aviva and Carole are at the center of all the drama this week. As you probably know, Carole released her new novel, The Widow’s Guide to Sex and Dating, while Aviva released her new memoir, “Leggy Blonde.” The subject of “ghostwriters” comes up when the two authors meet for lunch. It’s the one BIG What The Hell Moment that keeps on giving! But where did this “ghostwriter” phantom come from? What the hell was Aviva thinking?
A less than enthusiastic Carole says, “Aviva had been calling me to get me to help her with her book. I finally said we’ll have lunch and hopefully I’ll give her some advice and then we’ll move on.” Wishful thinking?
(A little small talk/banter as Aviva sits down and immediately says “you kicked me in my good leg” as she laughs. Then she tells Carole she has 15 hot men in her apartment because she is moving…they are all gorgeous and all straight and she wishes they were at her apartment right now. So is she implying maybe (Princess) Carole could have her pick of moving men? Aviva suggests they order pasta as she pulls out her new reading glasses…the closest thing she could find to Carole’s reading glasses. Carole finds this off putting and stalkerish. She is creeped out. After all, there are plenty of designer glasses in the sea…go get your own “look.”)
Get your own f*cking glasses and get your facts straight!
Now we get to the heart of the conversation! Aviva explains she has been writing a book, a memoir, and it’s been fun. It almost sounds like she is giving Carole an update and not really looking for any help. Aviva says writing a memoir is not like writing a novel, she is writing in her own voice and telling her life story. Piece of cake.
Aviva: And now it’s being edited.
Carole: I edited every single word in The Widow’s Guide…I tell them anything over two letters you can call me.
Aviva: Basically what she would do is make a change and I would either accept it or not accept it…they’re mostly grammatical…
Carole: How does it work, do you talk into a tape recorder?
Aviva: No, I wrote, I just wrote…
Carole: Did you end up hiring a writer?
Aviva: I didn’t.
Carole: (appearing a little surprised) So no one’s ghosting it?
Aviva: No. It was like writing an email…
Time out. Carole was the first one to bring up “ghostwriter,” but I got the sense, from this brief exchange, that Aviva may have lead Carole to believe that she was thinking of using a writer in previous conversations, it’s hard to tell. Except when the conversation continues, the impression I got becomes clearer…Carole must have understood, at some point, Aviva considered hiring a writer.
(Carole, in the confessional, says writing is her profession, it’s something she cares about deeply, it’s not like writing a long emails, so what Aviva is saying undermines those writers who have spent year after year honing the craft.)
Carole: I thought you were going to hire someone.
Aviva: No. no, remember the essay I wrote to Chicken Soup for the Soul?
Carole: That’s not really a book, that’s a letter.
Aviva: Wasn’t your first book, “What Remains?”
Carole: I was a journalist for 15 years before writing that.
Aviva: You wrote a lot of essays. Right, right. Did you ghost your books?
Carole: (seemingly stunned) Are you kidding me? No, I mean I’m a writer, I don’t know.
Aviva: You didn’t?
Carole: No I didn’t.
Aviva: So even though What Remains was your first book, you did it yourself, right?
Carole: I did it myself. I’m a writer, that’s what I do for 20 years. I thought you knew that.
Hell no, was I just insulted?
(Carole in the confessional confused about Aviva’s agenda. Is she implying Carole hired a ghostwriter to write her first book? That’s “awful and awkward and bizarre.”)
They get the check and leave. Now the two ladies must go off and tell someone about this lunch exchange, neither left happy. Aviva confides in Ramona, of all people.
Aviva says she had this “very disturbing” lunch with Carole. I didn’t find it disturbing, did you? Aviva explains that Carole has written one book and she was looking to her for some “guidance,” and she felt “one-upped and put down.” “Out of the gate she was like, ‘so you have a ghostwriter, right?’” She figured it was my first book, my first memoir. “So I said to her, when you wrote your first memoir, which was one book ago, did you have a ghostwriter?” And she says, “No, I’m a writer. She had this sort of attitude like, ‘I’m the writer,’ while being condescending. And then here comes the “dirt” Aviva didn’t mention to Carole , but saved for Ramona. Aviva alleges that “Carole shopped her novel at her publishing house and they passed because what she handed in needed to be overhauled; they needed at least eight months to have it completely reworked.” Then Aviva mentions the name of the “mystery ghostwriter” of Carole’s first book, as it was told to her, Bill Whitworth. Let’s ask Bill?
At the same time Carole meets Heather and Kristen in the park to unload her indigestion. She asks them, “Did you ever have a feeling, when you are having lunch with a friend, that you are being insulted? She shares she was talking about books with Aviva and telling her of her experiences and suddenly found herself having to defend her 20 year writing career. Not only that, Carole feels that Aviva has delusions of being a writer because she wrote a book in a hot minute. Then she tells them how Aviva said Carole hadn’t written a book before What Remains, and asked her if she hired a ghostwriter. Heather is stunned beyond disbelief. Carole says she was taken aback, not knowing if she was being insulted. Heather says, Carole is the person people would want to hire as a ghostwriter. Carole feels Aviva has questioned her integrity and credibility and her 20 year long career.
At the end of the show Carole attends Aviva’s house warming out of friendship, but hears from the other wives that Aviva is running her mouth with more ghostwriter talk. Carole needs to talk to Aviva and takes her upstairs to confront her about the lies she is spreading about her. Heather and Ramona both told Carole that Aviva is talking about her career. Carole tells Aviva there is no competition, she is happy for her, but there is no comparison concerning her career as a writer. A shouting match ensues.
Aviva tells her word on the street is Carole used a Ghostwriter and Carole tells her she doesn’t know what she is talking about. Carole says Aviva went through three writers. Her own publishing company doesn’t want to work with her because she is so difficult. Carole says she is a liar and a phoney. Aviva says she shopped her book, Carole said there was a bidding war and Aviva‘s publishing company lost. Carole ends up calling her a psychopath with no soul.
*******
WWHL…I stayed up past my normal bedtime to hear what Carole had to say about the show. Carole was quite upset in the show and understandably so. I hate when people lie about me, and here Aviva was doing it to Carole on national television about her career. I am sure she was dying to clarify everything that was said, and I for one wanted very much to hear it. Carole unequivocally denies ever having a ghostwriter, period. She writes every word, every revision, everything with her name on it. She says Aviva had three writers helping her and, out of respect for them, she will not name them. One in particular is well known and has helped several reality wives with their books. Carole explains, when you are a new writer, it is customary in the industry to have some help. When she asked Aviva about her “ghostwriter,” she was taken aback when she said she didn’t have one. Carole knew otherwise. Carole says Bill Whitworth was not her “ghostwriter” and she had even spoken to him yesterday. As for shopping her book around, Carole says this is also a total lie. There was a bidding war between six companies for the rights to Carole’s book and Aviva’s company lost. I found Carole to be sincere and glad to clear the air about everything Aviva said on the show. I believed Carole before, but after WWHL, there can be no doubt she is the one telling the truth. Aviva hit below the belt and it seems to me Carole may have cause to sue her because I think a good case for slander could be made here. There are many out there who unfortunately will believe Aviva and that could hurt Carole’s book sales.
I have stated before, I am a fan of the NEW wives, but when they are at odds with each other, may the best wife win. In this case, the best wife is Carole and her backup, “Holla” Heather. The truth always prevails in “my book.”
I'm not wild about Harry
The rest of the show…what happened between the first and last scene…was totally worthless. However I will say this about Harry and Sonja…I don’t get it…what does he have? A big wallet? A big ego? A big c*ck (Carole‘s words, not mine)? Nothing he has would be big enough to win me over. Enough said.
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