“Win, Place or Sonja” is the title of this trip to Saratoga Racetrack for more drama and horsing around. Why are we there? LuAnn decided it was a great idea for a girl’s trip and Lord knows, we have to have a girl’s trip every three weeks. The Bravo formula.
Aviva and Sonja check out Cody’s new ring. Cody, 24, owns a nail salon and is independent. Cody says George has a high sex drive and she enjoys him more than any other man she has known. George uses “equipment.” Sonja is intrigued because Cody says, “George knows a woman.” George doesn’t want her to have children until she is 35. Cody says she is doing well financially and is with George for George. Do you think George left her a little something in his will?
Kristen is looking for a hat for the Saratoga racetrack. LuAnn invited some of the girls to go to Saratoga with her. Kristen is excited to go. In pops Sonja, and Kristen plants a hat on her head. Sonja grew up 45 minutes from Saratoga so she feels like she is going back home. LuAnn arrives all hugs and smiles and starts trying on hats too. This must be the season of hats? Sonja says, “LuAnn has a head the size of a pumpkin, let’s face it.” Does size matter when it comes to heads?
Aviva and her husband arrive at the Museum of Sex. She thinks it’s the obvious choice for her father’s engagement party. If that doesn’t encourage his bad behavior, what will? Mario and Ramona are in the gift shop and Mario is “whipping” Ramona into shape. Carole is there too, even though she and Aviva are not really on good terms. Ramona says she has to tolerate George even though he is strange. George and Cody, the lovely couple, walk through the door. Ramona is immediately creeped out. George introduces himself to Kristen, who has already heard how everyone has been molested by George. Then she realizes George has a hand on her breast. I guess it takes Kristen a while to catch on? Ramona tells Cody to get her ring appraised and insured right away, and she approves of George’s fiancée. But Ramona can’t leave it at that. She wants to know what is the attraction. Cody says it’s the intellect and sex. Even though Sonja expressly warned Ramona not to bring up the parents, Ramona can’t help herself. Within the first two minutes of meeting her, Ramona brings up Cody’s parents who just died, and made her cry. Aviva tells her father that Ramona said something to Cody like she has no parents. George gets outraged. Aviva tries to calm him down. As usual Ramona flees the scene like a hit and run driver. Cody is offended by Ramona’s questions and comments. Kristen thinks it was typical and rude of Ramona. Aviva makes a speech and gets emotional when she brings up her mother. Aviva is keeping an open mind about the engagement to support her father.
Sonja and Lu are going for a bike ride and picnic to reconnect. Sonja sounds constipated as she grunts and groans going up hill. Sonja’s bike falls over, but the bottle of wine doesn’t break! LuAnn asks about the engagement party and George. She tells her Cody is 24 and he is in his eighties. Everything was fine until Ramona got there asking Cody questions after Sonja told her not to ask her about her parents. LuAnn tells Sonja she value her friendship with Ramona more than her friendship with her. Sonja kind of disagrees. Saratoga comes up and we learn there will be No Ramona and No Aviva at Saratoga! Great.
LuAnn’s rental in Saratoga. LuAnn loves to go to the races, wear dresses and hats and enjoy the nightlife. LuAnn, Sonja, Carole, Kristen, and Heather are all dressed in dresses and hats. It’s 10 am and Sonja is already drinking hard liquor! Go figure.
Ramona pops in on Aviva with some flowers, to apologize for making Cody cry. Ramona tells Aviva that Cody is vulnerable right now. A young girl with no parents. So she thinks maybe Cody is prey to an older man. Aviva says she asked her every question in the book and Cody is very happy. Just then George pops in for a visit. Wouldn’t you know it? Ramona isn’t pleased. George brings up Ramona’s charity event from last season. He says he screwed up and apologizes. So Ramona apologizes for making Cody cry. Ramona advises him if he really loves Cody he should let her go and find a man closer to her age. Ramona calls George lecherous and Aviva doesn’t think that was nice. I hate to agree with Ramona, but George is certainly lecherous (expressing lewdness and lust in a distasteful way) and he is even more offensive. George implies Ramona is a racist and made Cody feel like a turd. Ramona says the girl is 55 years younger than him. Ramona adds if her parents were alive they would do anything to get Cody away from George. Aviva says Cody wants to freeze George’s sperm to use one day. George gets very vulgar with Ramona, so much so I can’t make out what he is even saying and neither can Aviva. Ramona leaves. Maybe lecherous was putting it mildly?
Saratoga Springs! Sonja loves it. They chat with the jockey who won last year’s Kentucky Derby. Sonja flirts with the man who is half her size. Carole, who finds a silver lining in everything, says “the shorter the guy the longer his penis seems.” Good to know. The ladies are discussing the racing form and betting on horses, but Kristen is totally lost. Now they want to box a bet so if the horses come out in any order they still win. Heather thinks Sonja is a know it all. They act like they have to pool their money and bet all together when they can make their own bets. LuAnn laughs at Sonja’s two dollar bet. Sonja is sure they will be sorry when they lose. Then the race begins and horses 2-5-7 cross the finish line! Lots of screaming for those horses. Kristen is beside herself because they won. Sonja didn’t bet with them and they hit the jackpot. It’s a $3,340 win! Out comes the champagne! Sonja walks off by herself while they divide the loot. They text her, no response. Sonja went and found a man to talk to. What else is new? They leave her there and go back to the rental. They get dressed to go out and celebrate their winnings. Sonja comes back crying that they always ditch her. LuAnn tells her lets go downstairs and have some fun. Sonja is going on and on about how they left her. Sonja is clearly drunk. Heather is trying to reason with her and Kristen goes to rescue Heather. Kristen tries talking to Sonja, she is worried. Heather feels they texted Sonja and she didn’t answer, so it’s on her. Sonja is now taking it out her issues on Kristen and gets up in her face. Kristen can’t get through to Sonja and Sonja tells her to go f*ck herself, nice. I think Sonja is a sore loser, period. Sonja talks to herself in the mirror, finally someone she agrees with. Then Sonja comes downstairs with her luggage to go to the airport. ta ta.
Now I am off to read Carole's blog, the best in the bunch!