Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Mob Wives: A Genre of Music

Renee Graziano is a jazzy lady.
For those who don't know, I love music.  As I was listening El-P's latest album a thought crossed my mind.  If the Mob Wives were genres of music, what riffs & beats would we hear.  If one were to consider all the Mob Wives grew up in New York, it would be easy to lump them up into the genre of hip hop. New York is it's birthplace.  Yet, I do not see all the Mob Wives fitting easily into the world of hip hop.

Let's start with Renee Graziano, often referred by many of her fans as the Queen of Mob Wives.  By now many of us know Ms. Graziano worked professionally in the past as a stylist for 50 Cent (the rapper who many think ruined Ja Rule's career).   With Renee's strong love & ties to the hip hop world it would be easy to insert her into that genre.  I liken Renee's personality more to experimental jazz.   I'm thinking of the Miles Davis Bitches Brew era.  Her personality fits jazz more than any other mob wife.  Renee flutters, bangs and crashes emotionally week after week on Sundays.  She's all over the place.   Just as a brilliantly played jazz piece, she's up and down.  At the end of a great jazz tune you're left with a smile or extreme sadness smothered in a raw sense of beauty.

Next on the play list is Carla "F*ckin'" Facciolo (I apologize.  With the news of her banging Karen's uncle within the lifestyle airing on the Mob Wives Reunion part 1, that's my current nickname for her.)  Mrs. Facciolo reminds me of soft rock. Anyone can see she loves her kids and is loyal to Drita.  In spite of those great traits her personality remains a bit bland.  Soft rock is nice to listen to.  It's a light, showy, bright, gimmicky genre of music with little substance if any kind.  There are no thought provoking lyrics and it ends up being background noise.  The next time I'm in an elevator, Carla may cross my mind for a whole second.

Ramona Rizzo has an indie spirit. She will do her own thing.
The next mob wife up would be in high rotation of play on the radio stations.  It would be easy to label Ramona Rizzo, R & B.  There is a certain amount of quiet calm with Ms. Rizzo. There is equally always something bubbling under her cool demeanor.   Ramona is all the way indie rock. She's hard to define, even harder to put into a box.  One minute the music is loud,  then quiet.  Next it's crashing over you like the ocean.  As if an ocean I believe Ramona has the ability to drown her enemies in their truth.   She is fiercely loyal.  A quality I admire about Ramona is she never tries to be something or someone she is not. Indie rock doesn't try to be something it's not.  It's all encompassing and never really fits into one category.  It will be what it will be, which is why I liken Ramona to this style of music.

Big Ang is a larger than life character. Her delivery is simple and plain. Everybody who comes in contact with her feels happier.  Big Ang reminds me of rock concert. The groups who play the anthems that we all grew up with. We sing along and know all the words. Ang's personality makes you feel welcomed from the moment you meet her.  Big Ang is like the music that brings your childhood or teenage years flooding back to your memory as if yesterday.  For many of us that music is classic rock.  A great classic rock song will bring you back to the time you first heard it.  Great bands such as Aerosmith & Rolling Stones have driven countless women to lift up their tops.  *slaps forehead imagining Big Ang saluting Mick Jagger with her double Js*  Wait a minute doesn't her breast weigh more that Mr. Jagger?  The only genre fitting the magnitude of Big Ang's personality and boobs is classic rock.

Karen Gravano is loyal to a fault.  She is the truth.  Her reality whether past or present isn't wrapped up in a pretty bow on Christmas morning.  To her credit, she doesn't present it that way either.  Miss Gravano shares her reality with all it's imperfections.  Sometimes she is the lonely mother missing her daughter.  Other times she is the raging bull tired of the lies.  The genre which suits Karen perfectly is hardcore rap music.  She hits with her words and is the true OG of Mob Wives.  She can be up in your face like M.O.P. or she can be trying to get hers. At the end of the tune, she's genuine and not playing a role or character. She reminds me of Ghostface Killah. You might ask why I chose him?  His longevity, ability to change his style and outlast most of his brothers is a true definition of a champion.  Karen has parlayed her being on the show into a best selling book and a opportunity to partner in a day spa & skincare line. She is always on her grind.  Those familiar with GFK know he stays on his grind.

Drita D'avanzo might make a killing in the ringtone business.
Drita D'Avanzo also falls within rap music.  I'll be honest with you; I liked her rap in the French Montana video.  Do I think she should continue?  Why not, we need more rappers in the world.  As Pack FM once said,"... everybody is a rapper."  Time will tell whether Mrs. D'avanzo is a flash pan or what Hip Hop Heads refer to as ringtone rap.  Whether you like Drita or not, she is popular with the kids.  I totally understand it.  She is a badass on television.  If I were younger, I'd buy the television persona.  Frankly, I don't believe there is much substance or action behind all the tough hospital bravado.  With ringtone rap, you may know all the words but it's mindless drivel and it's all fluff.  The kids love it; they bob their heads to it.  However, I'm older.  I prefer substance.  Drita is ringtone rap.  Soulja Boy laughed all the way to the bank.  I hope Drita does too.  I'm sure Mr. D'avanzo use to laugh as he left the bank.

Now I am sure some will call me a hater.  Frankly I don't care enough about any of the Mob Wives to be labeled a hater.  Though Karen has referred to me as her Twitter boyfriend.  My crush on Karen doesn't blur my opinion in respect to any other mob wife.  I want all the Mob Wives to succeed.  So if my sharing my opinion good, bad or ugly makes me a hater, I'll own it.  I'll chirp until ESPN comes on.  The Mob Wives are no different than music.  Some love Lady GaGa in the meat steak get up and others are thinking, "What the f*ck?!"  Some people will pay thousands of dollars to see Barbara Streisand.  Others are like, "Bring back Milli Vanilli!"  Like the many musical genres that have saturated many of our lives, each mob wife brings something to the table.  Whether we like what each brings to the table depends on our varying tastes.  Frankly, I'm a Coca Cola guy.  If you like Pepsi, it's no skin off my nose.  If you're bored and have a Twitter account, you're welcome to follow me @undabawse.

Photo Credit: Our Bookie


Lucky Luciano said...

Drita could also be Techno. It has the same beat over and over and after awhile you get tired of hearing the same stuff over and over. Kinda like her talking about fighting all the time.

Chiara Soprano said...

Underboss enjoyed the blog. I know little to nothing about music so I am really getting an education. Mostly I enjoyed your humorous quips. Are you joining the ranks of the chirping crickets? Get in line behind me!

regina abney said...

Great blog and I think you picked perfect music for all the mobwives !!

Kel said...

Lol this was a funny blog and I enjoyed it. Great to get a taste of your writing style Unda. However, I'm going to have to agree with Lucky. I couldn't have said it better myself! Drita is definitely techno. She's loud, annoying and repetitive. I'm open to all sorts of music; yet somehow, techno has never been able to grow on me.

Lady EL said...

Sooo LOVED this blog! Music has always played a huge roll in my life. From learning how to play the guitar at age 5 because I fell in love with the blues and wanted to play along with my grandfather, to classical music while doing my homework to help me focus, all the way up to present day. Different genres of music set different vibes and I personally think you nailed it with your assessment of the MW ladies! Great job, I totally get where you are coming from. ;)

vai said...

You know I always love reading you're blog so I got nothing to say but lmao.

BTW, I'm on Drita's cricket list so ill be chirping behind you LOL.

Chiara Soprano said...

Vai, we crickets are all in great company, chirp, chirp

Anonymous said...

Karen is dropping hints on Twitter that she might not return for Season 3.

Anonymous said...

I really enjoyed this blog post and I credit the writer for using the word "fluff." :)

I think another possible type of music genre for Big Ang would be Broadway show tunes because she truly is larger than life.

I think soundtracks from 80s movies (ex: John Hughes films) may also be an idea for Drita because she is so entertaining to watch as are those movies with those songs on their soundtracks).

Again, this was such a nice blog and I enjoyed reading it (thanks for posting it).

Lucky Luciano said...

Chirp chirp