Mob Wives: A Little “Psy-Carla-gy”

M.M. tweeted, "I need a picture of Carla." Carla responded she'd see if she could find one, very kind of her.

Now, I am no shrink and certainly no Kelly Gorsky. In college I majored in Pool Hustling in the Student Union Building and classes got in my way. But I made a few observations the other day and right or wrong, here are my thoughts.

I have not been a huge Carla fan. In fact, I haven’t seemed to like her at all. I can point to things here and there, like I don’t think she is a good parent and I don’t like how she has a boyfriend while she is still married and the kids know who he is, and how the boyfriend is a grabber and Carla thinks it’s funny. Carla just seems to piss me off, especially because she can probably wake up, roll out of bed all bedraggled and still look gorgeous.

So I’m watching reruns the other day and found myself studying Carla. I imagined myself being a little kid, growing up in a mob affiliated family. Carla observed what was going on around her. She watched her mother just accepting this life like it’s no big thing. Carla loves her mother and is very close to her. She emulated her mother to the point that she started dating “bad guys” because it was normal. From what we see of Carla’s mother, she shrugs off what Joe did because “it’s not such a bad thing”. The kids don’t need to know what is going on with their father being in jail. Using this same way of thinking while raising Carla, I think she taught Carla not to think about things too much. Carla took this skill and honed it to the point where initially, it looks like she doesn’t care. But that is incorrect. Carla cares a lot.

Carla definitely loves her kids, no doubt. I’m watching the scene again where Jojo starts hitting Carla at the dinner table but this time, I’m watching Carla’s reaction. There is none. She doesn’t yell and she doesn’t react. She lets it slide.

Carla has been quoted as saying her favorite moment this season was while she was on the beach with her kids. I believe it. While I don’t think it was a great idea for her to bring the kids to see Joe for only a short time until he got to the halfway house, I think Carla was thinking more along the lines of letting the kids see their Dad, even if only for a short time. She has the ability to be a deep thinker; she is definitely not “dumb or stupid”. She just doesn’t allow herself to go into Deep Thinking Land when it comes to herself.

But when it comes to other people, she is indeed a deep thinker. Carla is a fantastic friend, especially to Drita. Anytime Drita needs her, she is there. (I’m sure that applies whether the cameras are rolling or not.) When Karen wanted to learn how to lose some weight, Carla was there. She very quietly let Renee talk about her grabby boyfriend a few times until she felt enough was enough. He grabs? So what? Let it slide. He’s fun and good with the kids. Again, the kids. The kids were a priority to her with Mr. Grabby Hands. (But yes, Renee, Carla deserves better.)

When the camera pans to Carla anytime she and Drita are talking, Carla is looking Drita straight in the eye and replies with some very empathetic remarks. She tells Drita things, such as she never would have expected cheating from Lee from what Drita has told her. That to me, speaks volumes. That tells me she accepted what Drita said about Lee before, and accepts what Drita said now. She has Drita’s back.

At Rare, before Drita turned into Spiderwoman, you can see Carla’s head go back and forth during the conversation, seriously trying to absorb what is going on between Drita and Karen. She is genuinely concerned. She does not get involved and does not yell. She just observes and absorbs. I agree with Carla that the whole Karen/Lee thing was so over. I agree that if I haven’t spoken to someone in 2 years, and I date their old boyfriend, that I don’t need to call my friend who I haven’t spoken to in over 2 years to tell her. I agree with Carla that Karen’s version of the timeline is skewed. I find myself agreeing with Carla so much that I start to think my opinion of Carla was skewed.

Somewhere along the line, Carla learned how to let things roll off her back and let things slide. It really takes a lot to push her buttons, like when Renee got in her face. She never seems to yell. Her reaction is usually sarcastic and quite honestly, often pretty funny. I like the quick interviews she is in. She makes a lot of valid points, which I hate to admit.

So, I give Carla more credit than I have previously. I took a quick walk in her stilettos and saw things a little differently. While I know I will never have the ability to let things roll off my back like Carla does, if they could make a Roll-Off-Your-Back-Carla-Pill, I’d take a half a pill every once in a while, for sure.

Especially if I could wake up and look like her, even on her worst day.