Saturday, July 2, 2011

Mob Wives: A Little “Psy-Carla-gy”

M.M. tweeted, "I need a picture of Carla." Carla responded she'd see if she could find one, very kind of her.
Now, I am no shrink and certainly no Kelly Gorsky. In college I majored in Pool Hustling in the Student Union Building and classes got in my way. But I made a few observations the other day and right or wrong, here are my thoughts.

I have not been a huge Carla fan. In fact, I haven’t seemed to like her at all. I can point to things here and there, like I don’t think she is a good parent and I don’t like how she has a boyfriend while she is still married and the kids know who he is, and how the boyfriend is a grabber and Carla thinks it’s funny. Carla just seems to piss me off, especially because she can probably wake up, roll out of bed all bedraggled and still look gorgeous.

So I’m watching reruns the other day and found myself studying Carla. I imagined myself being a little kid, growing up in a mob affiliated family. Carla observed what was going on around her. She watched her mother just accepting this life like it’s no big thing. Carla loves her mother and is very close to her. She emulated her mother to the point that she started dating “bad guys” because it was normal. From what we see of Carla’s mother, she shrugs off what Joe did because “it’s not such a bad thing”. The kids don’t need to know what is going on with their father being in jail. Using this same way of thinking while raising Carla, I think she taught Carla not to think about things too much. Carla took this skill and honed it to the point where initially, it looks like she doesn’t care. But that is incorrect. Carla cares a lot.

Carla definitely loves her kids, no doubt. I’m watching the scene again where Jojo starts hitting Carla at the dinner table but this time, I’m watching Carla’s reaction. There is none. She doesn’t yell and she doesn’t react. She lets it slide.

Carla has been quoted as saying her favorite moment this season was while she was on the beach with her kids. I believe it. While I don’t think it was a great idea for her to bring the kids to see Joe for only a short time until he got to the halfway house, I think Carla was thinking more along the lines of letting the kids see their Dad, even if only for a short time. She has the ability to be a deep thinker; she is definitely not “dumb or stupid”. She just doesn’t allow herself to go into Deep Thinking Land when it comes to herself.

But when it comes to other people, she is indeed a deep thinker. Carla is a fantastic friend, especially to Drita. Anytime Drita needs her, she is there. (I’m sure that applies whether the cameras are rolling or not.) When Karen wanted to learn how to lose some weight, Carla was there. She very quietly let Renee talk about her grabby boyfriend a few times until she felt enough was enough. He grabs? So what? Let it slide. He’s fun and good with the kids. Again, the kids. The kids were a priority to her with Mr. Grabby Hands. (But yes, Renee, Carla deserves better.)

When the camera pans to Carla anytime she and Drita are talking, Carla is looking Drita straight in the eye and replies with some very empathetic remarks. She tells Drita things, such as she never would have expected cheating from Lee from what Drita has told her. That to me, speaks volumes. That tells me she accepted what Drita said about Lee before, and accepts what Drita said now. She has Drita’s back.

At Rare, before Drita turned into Spiderwoman, you can see Carla’s head go back and forth during the conversation, seriously trying to absorb what is going on between Drita and Karen. She is genuinely concerned. She does not get involved and does not yell. She just observes and absorbs. I agree with Carla that the whole Karen/Lee thing was so over. I agree that if I haven’t spoken to someone in 2 years, and I date their old boyfriend, that I don’t need to call my friend who I haven’t spoken to in over 2 years to tell her. I agree with Carla that Karen’s version of the timeline is skewed. I find myself agreeing with Carla so much that I start to think my opinion of Carla was skewed.

Somewhere along the line, Carla learned how to let things roll off her back and let things slide. It really takes a lot to push her buttons, like when Renee got in her face. She never seems to yell. Her reaction is usually sarcastic and quite honestly, often pretty funny. I like the quick interviews she is in. She makes a lot of valid points, which I hate to admit.

So, I give Carla more credit than I have previously. I took a quick walk in her stilettos and saw things a little differently. While I know I will never have the ability to let things roll off my back like Carla does, if they could make a Roll-Off-Your-Back-Carla-Pill, I’d take a half a pill every once in a while, for sure.

Especially if I could wake up and look like her, even on her worst day.


Mob Mistress said...

I truly enjoyed this blog. It showed me a totally different angle to view Carla from. Carla was my early favorite along with Karen. Somewhere after episode 2 she lost me.

I have to admit to reading with great interest your perspective on Carla Facciolo. I had a couple of WTF? moments when it turned positive. But maybe that's just my issue from disappointment in liking her so very much in the beginning and then perceiving her as an instigator per the show.

As you mentioned we don't know Carla. All we can form opinons of her is from what we see of her on the show & interviews. At the end of the day whether I like her TV persona or not, she is living her life. I hope it's a happy & fulfilling one.

Isabella Incarceracianelli said...

Thanks, M.M. (and thanks for the picture of Carla, and thanks Carla!) I just suddenly saw a different view of Carla and thought I'd write about it. I also thought she was an instigator at first but now I think I misjudged her. Karen seems to be the Queen of Instigations.

I like Carla a whole lot more now since going psychobabble on her. I wish her and her beautiful kids all the very best. (And Carla, when those pills come out, please keep me posted!)

Chiara Soprano said...

Enjoyed the blog Isabella. I love reading different points of view because it opens my eyes to things I missed a long the way. You do make a lot of valid points in your blog and I will be watching Carla more closely in the future so see if my thoughts and opinions of her change. Thanks for sharing your perspective on Carla and I look forward to reading more of your blogs.

Mob Mistress said...

Carla didn't Tweet a picture last time I checked. I just went hunting for one. I did think it was very nice of her to offer to look for one.

I am glad your blog was pro Carla. LMAO! I need to stop laughing at myself.

Isabella Incarceracianelli said...

I am laughing at you laughing at yourself. Is that called IALAYLAY? Hmmm...I think LMAO is a lot easier. At any rate, thanks for the Carla photo and heck yeah, it was very nice of her to offer one. (SEE???)

TheOneTheyCallJoshyy said...

Must say i had the same thoughts of Carla in this blog. I couldnt stand her and really dont care for her now. But I kinda respect her so thats all that count! COuld she do beeter by raising her kids and making better relationship choices and life decisions, yes, but who nowadays couldnt. Must say I love the "Roll ouuta be gorgeous" comment because I think she is a very beautiful woman. But must say I love the "pill" comment even better. I may have to tell my dR. to prescribe me a FULL 5mnth prescirption for them cause Imma need them! Good job Issa! and Great job MM for the site, keep em coming!

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you wrote this. If there's one thing I appreciate and feel we need more of, it's a girl's girl. A real friend and a woman who's there for other women. I didn't notice this before. Now you point it out to me, I can see it. Thanks to re-runs, eh?

Lola said...

I don't think so ... she seems highly self involved... it's a nice take on her though.. I'm sure she appreciated it.

Anonymous said...

What about the fact that carla's MO is to sleep with married men!!!Ah you really dont know the self absorbed twisted liar.Now what!

Mob Mistress said...

None of the bloggers who write for this site really know Carla Facciolo.

We appreciate all your takes on Carla and thanks for commenting.