Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Real Housewives of New York: What The Hell Moments, S5E12

LuAnn does go to the event, but doesn't remember it's for charity!

First of all I would like to apologize for mixing up the names in last week’s blog. I seem to get easily confused with all the ever changing drama and behavior of these women. I can barely keep up from scene to scene and find myself praying for commercials so my brain can sort through it all. I have come to the conclusion that Carole is my favorite “Princess/housewife.” In spite of her royalty, or maybe because of it, she is the most down to earth, no nonsense, kind of person. I’ve see her be shocked, appalled, amused and bewildered by the behaviors of the others. It’s almost like she is a spectator and they are the participants/actors. Oh well I have been avoiding the WTH moments long enough, here goes…

Excuse #1: Ramona was too red faced for charity.

The luncheon was a disaster. Aviva was primed to lay into Ramona and Sonja for being no shows at her charity event. Ramona, of course, had a very good excuse. Her face was extremely red and she was afraid she would frighten the children. I don’t know why her face was red? I think she said it was from a facial. However, she forked over a nice check for the charity and got herself off the hook, unlike Sonja. 

Excuse #2: My dog couldn't stop peeing okay? I had to go to 
the vet! You don't get it!

Sonja was carrying on about her 17 year old dog who couldn’t hold water. She had to take him to the vet, no one else could do it for her, even though she has 17 interns doing nothing but laying on her bed. I don’t get it? Why the hell couldn’t one of them take the dog? The dog was not going to be put to sleep right there and then. In the event of an emergency, she could have been called, right? Surely an intern knows how to make a phone call? In any event, the dog excuse wasn’t flying with Aviva. I think what put the story over the top was the dog being embarrassed to wear diapers. Aviva was getting more annoyed with every word Sonja uttered, until she exploded.

Oh I get it alright, you just didn't want to be there to support THE CHILDREN!

“This is not about me or my charity, it’s about THE CHILDREN who are missing legs!” Aviva’s famous last words. In retrospect, maybe she could have lured them there if she has served wine? Let’s face it, the excuses were nothing more than BS.

Ramona admires herself the whole time. Ugh!

Ramona and LuAnn sure make a spectacle of themselves at the swimsuit store. Why are they getting along? They are bonding over bathing suits, sex talk and Aviva’s phobias. Why the hell can’t they leave Aviva alone or change the damn location of the vacation if they all want her there so badly. It’s as simple as that. Small planes, big planes, anxiety, phobias…I had to take a sleeping pill after the show I was so wound up.

Sonja thinks the needle is like a man's penis. 
When was the last time she had sex???

Ramona and Sonja go for injections at the plastic surgeon‘s office. Sonja’s injection is in her abdominal area, and she describes it as like a “penis.” WTH! I guess she hasn’t been with a man in FOREVER! Meanwhile, the massage of Ramona’s ass, gives her a welcomed “orgasm.” Could Mario be falling down on the job? Why the hell are we seeing these scenes? Bravo must be running out of material to air.

Oh Mario, you need to get one of these things! Wow!

As usual the coming attractions always look so much better than the episode I just watched. Anyway, if you are a fan of the show, please check out stoopidhousewives.com where they have everything on all BRAVO housewives and then some!


Monique said...

Chiara, I had never seen the RHONYC, but after reading your WTH moments I went back and got up to date on the episodes and also starting reading Stoopidhousewives and I am hooked! This is something like a car wreck. You know you should keep it moving, but are so intrigued you have to keep looking.

I agree with your Carole observation. She is definitely a spectator in this whole fiasco. Her comments are so witty and its almost as if she says what I am thinking. I read her blog on Bravo's website and she does not put an ounce of seriousness in her participation on the show. It's almost as if she is living out a satire for her amusement and for writing material.

These ladies are so ridiculous. I have never seen anything like it. Since I am original Mob Wives fan, I can't help but compare these minute, infantile and shallow problems to those of the original MW (which are as real as they come). I mean come on!

I don't want to come across as someone who is pompous or judgmental but these ladies are real brats. There are times that I do laugh, like seeing Ramona eavesdropping on Heather and Aviva's conversation then screaming at her and walking away.

These ladies are completely and utterly delusional. Have you noticed that their (insert random housewife name here - lol) issues and problems are the biggest ones in the group.

There are a few things I don't understand. One of them being their men. These guys (like Mario) seem like sensible down to earth kinda guys that seem like they wouldn't have the patience to deal with some of their petty behavior. But I guess the heart wants what the heart wants, even if it is a bat shit crazy NY housewife.

Thanks for introducing them to me and like you said- I think the best is yet to come (or so we hope).

I am dying to see what makes Aviva call Ramona and Sonja "white trash"- CLASSIC!

Chiara Soprano said...

Thanks Monique...I don't take the show seriously and sometimes I mix up the names. Mario is Ramona's husband and they have been on the show 5 years, one of the original couples. I don't care for him or view him as serious at all. He is Ramona's accomplice LOL. I think the best is yet to come and they will get even more ridiculous and obnoxious. if you hold out for the reunion, they make quite a spectacle of themselves. I just blog them to make fun of them. Carole is my favorite because she always makes sense. Always love to see your comments Monique! xoxo